Types of P*ssies

I was arguing with my girlfriend about some shit. You know what “some shit” is, don’t you? “Some shit” is when you get to the end of the argument and you can’t remember what shit started it, but shit starts flying everywhere, then you start a new, bigger, deeper argument based “some new shit” that was said, and you can’t even remember the original shit.

My girlfriend likes to get quiet in arguments at times, and I think that’s the worst thing to do in an argument. Because then it’s on me to say something interesting enough to warrant a response. I think Mel Gibson and his lady had this issue.

Well we were arguing and I said near the end of it all, “What I need is some is some regular, normal, girl-next-door, square pussy...I don’t need all this shit.” Some more shit was thrown, then she did more quiet treatment, then I got horny and wanted to feel on her, then I apologized, then I had to go to work.

But while I was walking to work, I thought about that statement I made. “What I need is some regular, normal, girl-next-door, square pussy...” And I thought of all the different types of pussies there is out there, and these are the thoughts I had of the different types of pussies while on the train:
  • You’ve got your gun-toting pussies - These pussies will stash drugs, conceal weapons, run a route, fuck in visiting rooms, put you up on the latest slang and rap music, very loyal, but come with a lot of stupid fucking drama...smh
  • Then there’s these terrorist Al-Qaeda pussies - hates all men, wishes the world was full of dry, sour, stinking pussies just like them, willing to strap on bombs and explosives and go into the largest crowd of men, say a football game, and blow itself up, screaming, “Fuck All Men!” Just to make a point.
  • And your independent pussies - they’re like pussies with a purpose. Very strong pussies, work out every day, can snap a dick like a pencil, non-emotional, briefcase carrying pussies that only want to know the bottom-line. “Snap-Snap!” (sound of dicks snapping)
  • There’s Similac pussies - young, green pussies that haven’t quite determined what kind of pussy they want to be yet, so there coasting along happy-go-lucky and free. Hopefully, they avoid Al-Qaeda pussies, but they will select their major in pussy college later in their studies.
  • New pussies - could be any old used pussy, but new to me...not yet determined pussies.

All kinds of pussies out there: hallelujah pussies, abandoned pussies, dancing pussies, black hole pussies. I've barely scratched the surface on all the different varieties of pussies there is, but these were just my thoughts on the way to work:)


1 comment:

  1. LMFAOOOO!! I love this!! Well, everything up until the pussy part cuz I don't know anything about no pussy labeling lol
    Anyway, the only reason I have time to even read this entry at this exact moment is because I'm giving the silent treatment in the middle of a "some shit" argument, and the muthafucker has the remote to the tv.